Motivational Monday

Rome was not built in one day… or with international diplomatic announcements either

The way to reach a year long goal is not to talk about it every day for the month of January and then forgetting about it until December. While that is obvious, many do live their lives that way.

The down side of talking about the goals as if completed is that the mind gets a dopamine jolt of imagining the completion. That takes some of the wind out of the sails. How? Well, the more you talk about it as if it’s done the more it starts to feel like “this is easy.. I can quickly get it done”. The goal doesn’t seem as tough to reach anymore. The amount of effort needed appears less. The mind then focuses on what is more urgent for the sensation of survival. Next thing you know, you’re doing that instead of working the big goal.

In conversation, that often looks like this… “Hey Bill, whatcha working on?” “Oh, nothing to big. I’m going to hit the gym after work, then, I’m going to email the updates to the project. No big deal. It’s a piece of cake”. “Sounds like you got it all figured out Bill, good luck.” “Yeah, I got this… no need for luck”.

Working in silence means not tooting the horn of victory too far in advance. Life has a funny way of humbling those who toot too early. I am guilty of being humbled like that pretty hard recently. But that is for another blog post… maybe… lol

This working in silence does not mean going into one’s basement and slaving away at a project and only surfacing when done. That is not what this means.

Working in silence means not bragging about the project to those who need not know that you’re working on your project. Most companies will not let you know anything about new product launches while they’re in the design phases. They will instead have very private focus groups, very private planning meetings, very private learning sessions, very private testing sessions.

Once they know the project will succeed and they’re now moving towards completion, then… and usually only then… will you hear about it. They will make sure you hear about it and find it awesome. They will market it and push it… they will even make sure there are pre-order validations. Get a lot of buzz about it.

Once the project is done and the product is out… the world swarms in… results start to pour in… they dive deep into understanding the data and planning upgrades to the product. By the time anyone has figured it all out, they’ve made their fortunes (or lost it) and moved on.

The product spoke for itself.

As we tackle the week, it’s OK to get advice. In fact, it is not wise not to get any advice. However, the work has to be done in silence. The work has to be done in full protection from haters. That means… those who need not know should not. Lay off social media when working to improve your game. Lay off over sharing with family and friends who may not share your vision.

Do the work in silence. Once you know that you’re there, then, talk about your story and help motivate someone else to get their results.

To wrap up, let’s look at this in more practical terms.

The goal is to drop 15lbs. I’m taking this example because many have that resolution to get more fit. Why not use that as a closing story.

Most people will share on social about their goal. Many will post photos of others who have done the goal. They will invest in new outfits for their workouts and post selfies of it all over the web. They will read a few motivation quotes and share that quickly.

The dopamine hit of doing something feels great. The smiles beam. They did something. Or did they? All of that curated work did absolutely nothing to get them anywhere closer to their goal.

The work in silence method means that you don’t do all that talking. Instead, you carve out time to get a fitness coach. You actually get to the gym. You have accountability partner(s). You do the actual work. You meal prep. You apply what you’re learning and reading. You test what works. You track what you’re doing on paper (that includes spreadsheets and a few useful apps)

At first, nothing will happen. That’s totally normal. But the peace that comes from not having tons of people checking in to find out if you’re doing anything is priceless. The masses don’t know. Just those who can help and are actually helping know. And they’re more interesting in you staying the course than the actual numbers on the scale. Why? Because they know if you stay the course, you will get the results on the scale.

Once the program is weeks old or even months old, the results start to come in. People start to notice. Hey, look at Jimmy, he’s getting slimmer… what’s going on? Then… you can humbly say… “it’s been four months now since I’ve been keeping my resolution to get fit. Thank you for noticing”. Now the results are speaking for themselves.

At that point, if someone wants to know more, it makes sense to share more. Now, the attention is not on the resolution but on the results and how to duplicate it. You’re actually doing what you would have said you’d be doing.

Those who knew all along will be supportive and will do the sharing to help you as well. Your actions will have won more credibility than any spoken words you could have said.

By the end of the year, no one will even remember all the talk others had done. But they will know and remember that you got your goals hit and kept the weight off. Now, you’re a voice of authority on the subject. The following year, when people want to get fit and trimmed down, they will go to you first. You have the track record. You have the stage to now speak with authority about how to get fit in a given year. Now your work is speaking for you. Now is a good time to toot the horn, so to speak.

This week, what is the one thing you will focus on that will move you towards your goals? What will make a difference in your efforts? Get clear on that. Then, break it down into five steps. The work week is five days, so each day gets one step. Then, focus in on that day’s goals and work in silence and peace towards that completion.

Don’t brag about it. Don’t over share about it. However, once the week is done, do celebrate your win!

Have an awesome productive week!