Five Alive

Happy Five Year Anniversary!

November 4, 2013. What a run! What a life changing journey. I’m five years into blogging!!! Well beyond my wildest expectations.

In the calendar year of 2017, a lot of writing took place. I mean, a lot. OK, not all on this blog. But. Still. A ton. I’m more active on three blogs and semi-active on a fourth. I’m still struggling with the feelings of being an impostor with regards to the launch of my fifth blog.

I’m struggling with a lot of identity questions and self-worth issues. I’m stressed about balancing life, writing, photography, and a lot of other creative outlets I don’t want to let go. Plus, my family has grown beyond the size I had originally planned to have.

My writing game has matured and is still maturing. My internal conversations about who I am as an artist is starting to make sense again. But, there is the question of time.

this blog post is being written from the comfort of 2018… before the actual anniversary date

I was now starting to speak to people in the real world about my blogging as being a real thing instead of a theoretical project that had no specific launch date. I mean… really… I’ve been blogging five years now and I’m finally starting to admit I actually have a blog. Go figure.

My systems for writing were maturing and getting more consistent. The struggle to not announce projects prematurely was a point of stress. I was telling folks I was getting good enough to have a book out by the close of 2017. Of course, writing this from the ‘future’ I can tell you that the book never got published in 2017. I am learning that rewrites are way more involved than I thought. With four children, full time job, other creative outlets, and entrepreneur hopes… finishing the book in 2018 is going to be tough but doable. (I am realizing that I use the anniversary date as a chance to look back on the prior calendar year instead of the year of writing… making me chuckle as I edit this post before it goes live months from now)

I took the advice of a friend and had someone proofread my first book attempt. The red ink blew my mind away. Yeah, I was getting OK with blogging but was not ready for the prime time of authorship. So, I put my head down and pressed harder than ever to improve my writing.

There has been a few blog posts about my process and the gains I made shared already.

2017 saw 55 posts for nearly 60k words on this blog alone. And to think that this blog was the one I wrote the least amount of words for. I created several manuscript of stories that will eventually get edited and polished for publication.

I had so much fun in 2017 as a writer. I really love this craft. I’m now able to incorporate my photos into my blogging… finally. I’m sharing my work across social media more. I’m learning how to showcase my work even more. I’m not as scared about asking friends to read my blog.

Never felt more alive as I did in 2017… with regards to writing. A bit too alive one might say. Now, the pressure is on to be better balanced. I have to upkeep my promises to my family. I have to keep up my pace with my readers. I have to keep motivated.

I’ve learned to say no to a whole lot more things so I can stay the course on writing. Constant adjustments. Constant revisions. Constant asking questions. 2018 tested these resolutions and helped me refine them. Despite all the setbacks and hurdles… I’m on track to clear over 500k words across all my blogs and the book… this calendar year. (less than what I wanted… given the demands of my offline life)

And the family news keeps flowing in. Life keeps getting more complex and more challenging. As alive as 2017 was, never have I been more aware of my limitations as I have in 2017. I’m not skipping on the way I feel in 2018… more alive and more driven than ever. However… I plan to write about that in 2019 when the anniversary arrives… since I may talk about it in a retrospective tone again. Who knows. Lol.

As I’m concluding this post… my newborn calling out to me to be fed. Life has changed yet again. Looking forward to year six motivated me to do a series of short posts celebrating each milestone… retrospectively.

Writing has been the single biggest challenge of my mental game as a mature adult. This project that was supposed to be a ‘quick win’ turned out to be the humble teacher I needed to wake myself up from my limiting beliefs.

I’m a writer. I’m an author. I’m a storyteller. Writing is just one of the many tools by which I tell a story.

Cheers to another anniversary!!!!

Thank you all for following. Thank you for supporting. Thank you for commenting. Thank you for friendship. Thank you for believing in me.

Feeling very much alive as a content creator. Hoping my journey has inspired someone to push towards their dreams. Stay motivated. Stay alive. Be great… on purpose!