No to New Year’s Resolutions

Many years ago, I kissed New Year’s Resolutions goodbye! I was tired of being tired of not keeping them past March… worse… not making it to February with them.

It was starting to feel like I was setting up my feelings for hurt and disappointment. Then. I heard a guy give a talk. In there, he explained how these pesky resolutions were damaging to confidence, self-esteem, and ego. I had to kick those things to the curb for the sake of my already fragile ego. (yes, we guys have fragile egos… some too fragile to admit it)

Ever since the new resolution to not make any New Year Resolution, my track record has been spot on perfect! I mean, no blemishes. It has boosted my confidence, my ego, and self-esteem. OK, not more than a quarter of a half a percentage point. However, it does feel good knowing I don’t have that dreaded feeling that the process of setting resolutions is futile and destined to fail.

Let’s be clear however, that doesn’t mean I don’t have new plans and goals at the beginning of a year. No. Not at all. Just I don’t have any new resolutions.

What’s the difference anyway?

A set of goals does not have to wait for a specific date to start. A New Year Resolution can only take place at the very start of a brand new year. That’s the difference really.

Oh, and yeah, goals tend to have specificity to it when done right. Resolutions tend to be spur of the moment on the fly type of thing that falls into a few neat categories. I wanna lose weight. I wanna be a better person. I wanna quit a particular vice.

Resolutions are aspirational without any “how to” punch behind them. And that’s why they fail. There isn’t much planning for them before the start of the year, they’re not followed up with much consistency, and they’ve got no plans to ensure their success. They rely on sheer will power.

Life has a funny way of beating willpower. It just has to throw enough urgent distractions at you and before you know it, you’re too busy fighting off life than worrying about resolutions.

Downside to resolutions

The downside to making resolutions is that it will set the habit of promising lies to yourself. Think about it for a second.

OK.. Two seconds

If every year your goals/resolution is to work off 15 pounds and each year you’ve gained a pound for 15 years. What you’ve essentially told yourself is that you’re not only not worth the effort to make the resolution work, you’re a failure at the very things that are important to you. Why try!

Too harsh?

How do you feel in February when you realize you’re off pace for reaching your goals and now you’re no longer actively working on them?

Go ahead… grab that tub of ice-cream and ponder that a bit. You do feel bad.

Then, you start moralizing things. Well, I must not really be that good to keep resolutions. I really shouldn’t aim so high so I don’t disappoint myself. After all, I’m not that smart to lose 15 pounds. And worse, I don’t have a chef, I don’t have a weight loss coach, I don’t have the money to have the support to make this work.

You start a death spiral of negative self talk… all because of one simple New Year Resolution.

That’s why I don’t do them

In all seriousness, there has to be a better way to make a year look better and also work. Yes, there is the whole vision boarding, goal setting, life planning… there has to be an alternative… and there is on the next page click 2 below